Tomorrow is Mother's Day ~ the day that is set aside for mothers. I don't know exactly what is supposed to take place on this day, but I know it must be a day to honor and celebrate moms and motherhood. The problem is, I know very few grown people who actually want to spend time with their mothers. I read the Lyman's grown daughter's tribute to her parents and frankly, I was speechless. It left me wondering...
How do we, as parents, get to that point? That point where our children are grown but still think the world of us as they did when they were two? And, is it really possible?
It must not be as easy as simply having a good relationship with one's children because I think a lot of people have a 'good' relationship with their children. But you don't hear many people talking on Sunday about how excited they are to go see their mom after church.
And is every woman meant to be a mother? I think some women don't have that nurturing, mothering gene. I know that God created all women with a loving, nurturing heart, but somewhere in the fall, I think some women are actually not able or capable to have a mother's heart.
So, what if a mother wasn't a good mom? I've heard moms say, "Well, I did my best." But really, who among us always does our best? How do we 'honor' a mom who was mean or abusive or neglectful? What about the mom who took out her anger on her children or the mom who simply couldn't put her children's needs before her own? What then is the responsibility when the bible says to honor our mothers? Is it best to smile and give a card and a flower? Isn't that a lie? I know that no mother is perfect, yet holidays such as these always leave me wondering what Christ desires from us in these situations. I see these sappy commercials on television for mom's day and my heart breaks for the men and women who have mothers that just stunk. For the little children who don't know any different life than the life they are living, even if it is horrible and violent. And I weep for the children who are abused, yet when they are hurt or scared, they cry out for the very person who hurts them the most, their mom.
I don't know. I just don't want my relationship with my children to end simply because I am not needed anymore. I want my relationship to evolve to a new role when they are grown. I want to support and encourage them in their lives and endeavors, their successes and failures. I just am discouraged by how rare that seems to be.
As for me, my mother is out of town, so I'll have plenty of time to enjoy the day just being with my family. And of course, my family is awesome and the best anyway because they give me a nap every single Sunday.
4 comments:
I love my mommy! I enjoy spending time with her...We start to grate each others nerves if we spend toooo much time together all at once, but I do love her very much.
I would be very surprised if your kids turned on you...I think they will always honor you. And if they don't send them to me and I'll bust 'em up!
I agree that not everyone should be a mother. When I was very young I kind of knew in my heart I never wanted to have kids. Lots of reasons, but mainly because I just never connected to the idea. I like kids, I enjoy working with kids for my job but that's as far as it goes. Infants especially I just don't know what to do with. If someone asks me to hold one I usually decline. The thought of carrying a child is interesting but it's not a strong desire and the whole job of parenting seems foreign to me. Give me animals and I'm good to go...People, not so much. It's the nurturing gene that you mentioned...I think mine is missing or underdeveloped. :)
I have always said that if God told me he wanted me to have kids or adopt them I would, but of my own accord I would not choose it.
Guess I'm just weird. :)
my hope is that my kids will honor me, love me and forgive me for when i screw up. because i do practically every day. i don't always put their needs before mine. i get angry at them frequently. i think the reason they are in my life is to make me a better person. i think the biggest thing for me as a mom is being able to say i'm sorry for when i'm not the best mom in the world. i want my kids to see me and my faults and love me anyway. just like i do them.
So are you going to make your family celebrate Mothers day two weeks in a row? I personally enjoy my parents. I go over there at lest 1 or 2 times a week.
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