Showing posts with label gable pat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gable pat. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Slight Variations of Words

My friend bought a new car. It's a Volvo, something like the one pictured below.

Except the license plate is different.
The wheels are different.
And it's a different year.
Oh, and the steering wheel is on the other side.

Other than that, it's just like this one.
When she pushes a button, the hard-shell convertible top just pops up and covers the car.

Just like that.

It is impressive looking, and so mechanical looking. Kind of like this:


When we first saw it, one of the boys commented how much it looked like a Transformer. He and his friend came up with a pretty creative name for a transforming car:

Volvotron.

The problem is that while in the car tonight, he kept calling it:

Vulvatron.

(I'm giving you a moment to let that sink in. It's alright, it took me a minute too.)

Jon: Hey, buddy. You should be careful how you say that. It's Volvotron, not Vulvatron.

Boy: Okay (not listening, continuing with his story) My friend's mom's new Vulvatron is great, My friend's mom's Vulvatron is amazing, blah, blah, blah.

Jon: No, really. It's VOLVOtron, not VULVAtron. A Volvo is a car. A Vulva is a part of the female anatomy.

Boy: (Stops dead, hands up) Dad, seriously. I did NOT need to know that.
(pauses) It's just that I'm just not that into hearing about the female anatomy and all.

------------------------------------------------

And now, at 11:00 p.m., most of the house is still up, waiting, watching the clock eagerly. For at 11:32 p.m., 11 years ago tonight, a second Price baby boy was born.

The fireworks are ready.

We must wait.
We must celebrate.
Tick, tick, tick...

Friday, July 24, 2009

Clark Able

You just can't judge a book by it's cover. Well, you can, but it's not always effective.

Take my child, for example. We'll call him 'Clark Able', okie dokie?

He's sweet. He's sensitive - often times to a fault. He's quiet and holds back. He stands off at the edge of a crowd.

Sometimes.

He's also loud, rude, and opinionated. Sometimes.

And at those times, I just do not know what to think. Because loud, rude, and opinionated looks quite different on a boy than on a girl. Quite often, being loud, rude, and opinionated involves only one thing to a male:

The digestive and excretory system.

I do not know why this system is such a constant source of fascination to the male species, but it is.

And no matter what the weird noise is, no matter how awful the smell, or how long a burp lasts, it is congratulated and laughed at and discussed at length.

It just never gets old.

I have tried to shield my children, my precious boys, from this obsession. But, alas, they have all fallen, one by one, prey to the clutches of their father.

This child in particular.
We went to a friend's home for lunch a few weeks back. (Jon had invited himself and his family, only he forgot to mention that little fact to me until I was actually in the people's home, now feeling like a total party crasher. But we're not discussing that now.)

Moving on.

I was already feeling a little out of place due to that. You know, the thing I am not discussing right now...
Plus, we had never really had dinner with them before.
Plus, they think that our kids are absolutely great.
Plus, there was that thing that was making me uncomfortable. You know, that which I am not discussing.

Ahem.

We were just finishing up a beautiful lunch and I was beginning to relax a little when this child of mine pushed his plate back, leaned back in his chair, put his hand over his stomach, and announced, "Whooo-OOOO! I gotta' go to the bathroom if you all know what I mean."

Quickly I did what any mother would do, I shot him 'the eye'. This promptly shushed him, but only temporarily.

A few minutes later, he opened the bathroom door. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, standing posed in the bathroom doorway. I figured that if I ignored him, he would get on with his life.

Unfortunately, being a guest in someone's home, they tend to not ignore someone standing frozen in a bathroom doorway.

"Lordy, Lordy, Be! You do NOT want to know what just went on in here and you definitely do NOT want to smell what just happened in here!"

Yeah.

Never.
Gets.
Old.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Sunny & Hot

I cannot even fathom how different life would be like without the pool. It has been such a huge part of summer, of our lives, over the past five years.

Growing up, I always wanted to be one of 'those' kids. The kids with their goggles wrapped around their wrists and their hair bleached and sun-streaked. The ones with the bronzed bodies, smelling of sunscreen and sweat...

And now I have three of 'those kids'.



Not exactly the Doublemint twins, but they are pretty darn refreshing looking...


Each time this poor boy got up to flip, his father offered such helpful tips as, 'Flip harder' and 'Jump higher'. All the while sitting in his lounge chair recording.

Ah yes, life is good.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

The Great Grocery Experiment

Over the past thirteen years, grocery shopping has gone through many phases and many challenges.

Shopping with an infant proved to be very stressful. Just as I finished my sprint through the grocery store, I would be faced with a wailing, hungry child. The prospect of feeding a tiny child in the grocery store was daunting, especially coupled with the fact that this hungry babe would soon be a very poopy babe and that would require a diaper change and probably, a clothing change. So, more often than not, I left my grocery cart and returned at a later time to pick up my goods.

As I gained more children and more experience, there were new challenges associated with the grocery store. I learned to starve my toddler before shopping so that the entire time in the store could be spent with little finger foods to pacify them. I learned to carry a baby, breastfeed, talk to a toddler, pick out food, and pull a shopping cart simeotaneously.

Then came the phase when the boys learned that they had some control over what went into the cart and that whatever went in the bags went back to our home and into their mouths. I can't say that we have ever had food-related tantrums in the store, but we definitely have had many discussions relating to what we need and what are luxury items. Granted, there is absolutely nothing wrong with luxury or convenience items. Sometimes one just has to have a pack of Oreos or the occasional can of Spaghetti-O's. I get that. What has been a lifelong lesson for me as well as the boys is the fact that we have a set amount of money alloted to groceries each week. If we buy all convenience foods, we will have no money left for the bulk of the food that we eat. Fun foods disappear within a day or two. After that, what is left?

Enter, the Great Grocery Experiment!

Yesterday morning, the boys and I were going through local ads to get our list together for grocery shopping at Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart price matches any local competitor's price as long as you bring in the ad. For example, if Kroger has milk for 88 cents, when we get to the register, we just say, "I'd like to price match this milk for 88 cents." Done. It's quite cool, actually, and it allows us to get all the big deals without going to Kroger, Meijer, and Wal-Mart.

As we were going through the ads, the boy were circling everything that they were interested in: Doritos, Pop Tarts, Lunchables, Pepsi. As we began to narrow the list down, I had an idea and that idea became the basis for the Great Grocery Experiment.

Our grocery budget is $150 per week. There are five in our family, so that is $30 per person per week, or, rounded up, $5.00 a day. I challenged the boys to make out their own menu and feed themselves exclusively on the food that they could buy with $15 for three days. I knew there would be junk food and soda pop, but I was curious to see what would transpire.

Each boy spent time preparing a list and researching prices before we left. They had mixed feelings. Jonah was stoked and definitely did the most research. Gable was apprehensive, afraid that he would run out of food and starve. I assured him that he did not have to do the challenge, but if he did, over the three day period, I would not let him starve, but I would let him feel hungry. Jack was just excited and as any seven year old would be and did little planning or research. (He did, however, ask if he could buy only ramen noodles for three days and spend the rest on a Lego set.)

Although I really wanted (and I mean really wanted) to give them pointers and warnings, I also knew that in order for any of us to gain knowledge as well as enjoy the challenge, I needed to let them be. Be 13, be 10, and be 7...with $15 in their pockets! I wanted them to buy all junk food or all name-brands or all soda pop. I just wanted to have a little fun with it and see what happened.

Gable was definitely the most cautious at the store. He also is the one who spent the least. I think he has $1.50 left.

For his three days worth of food, he chose two instant lunch cups, three bags of Ramen noodles, a box of Cheez-Its, eight cans of Pepsi, one can of Skyline, one box of spaghetti, two cans of tuna, one can of Ravioli, one pizza lunchable, one half gallon of chocolate milk, and one half gallon of orange juice. A 10-year old's dream, a mother who worries a bit too much about healthy eating and healthy teeth's worst nightmare.

Jonah, as expected, is probably going to have the most satisfying meals over the course of three days. He bought pizza rolls, Doritos, a pound of bacon, a dozen eggs, pop, milk, five oranges, a box of macaroni and cheese, a loaf of bread, and two boxes of instant noodles. He's already had offers for trades, but the deal was clear: Whoever accepts the $15 accepts the full challenge rules of eating exclusively what they purchased. Water and salt and pepper are freebies from mom and dad. Also, they are permitted to purchase small quantities of butter or condiments, so they each saved some money for those purchases.



This is where I lost it. Look at this face. Look at his satisfaction. Look at a seven year old with $15 in his pocket...

Seriously, when Jack brought this big box of chips to me, I laughed so hard in the cereal aisle that I snorted. Several times. This stupid box was $10! Do you know how hard it was to let him buy this? But a challenge is a challenge. I did ask him what he planned to eat for breakfast. He said chips. I asked about dinner. He said chips. Lunch? You get the drift. All in all, Jack ended up with 36 bags of chips..., a dozen eggs, milk, Dr. Pepper, and vanilla wafers. And for dinner last night? He put five bags of chips on a plate and drank out of the Dr. Pepper bottle.
I simply cannot stop chuckling at all this.
One thing is for sure...this is going to be a really interesting three day challenge!